Our clients come from all walks of life. The beginnings of their stories are all different, and so are the endings. But one thing each woman has in common is this: when she comes to Mother's Heart, she is in the midst of a crisis. Tina (not her real name) is one of the many women who walked through our door. This is her story, as told to one of our social workers who helped weather her crisis pregnancy.
Tina is the youngest in her family. They were so poor that she only finished the 7th grade. She came to Phnom Penh in search of work to help her family. She waited tables and learned massage but didn't earn very much. During this time, she met a man at work and fell in love. Things were going well between them until she found out he was married and it was too late - she was already pregnant.
Tina knew, in her heart, she wanted to keep the baby even if she would have to do it alone. She didn't want her mother to know, afraid that shame and shock would be too much for her mother's ailing heart to bear. She kept it a secret from her whole family.
She knew of MHO from her friend and made her way to us. When we first met her, she poured out all her emotions and blamed herself. Disappointed, rejected, alone and not knowing what to do next, Tina, we learned, was also on the verge of being homeless. She used to live with friends but, when she got further along in her pregnancy, she could no longer work and contribute to the living costs. With nowhere else to go and no one else to turn to, she found herself on our doorstep.
Mother's Heart accepted Tina to the program with open arms. She entered our women's house and while there, we noticed she was very responsible, helped out when she could, and looked out for the other women there. Mother's Heart helped her not only with the delivery expenses but also taught her practical skills on how to take care of herself and her baby.
After giving birth and feeling stronger, she found work as a manager at a physical therapy shop and worked hard. She is training and managing staff. Tina is happy that she can take her baby with her to work, too. It is challenging for her most times, juggling work and child-rearing at the same time, but she is determined to make it work.
Tina is getting recognized for her hard work and diligence. The shop where she works is expanding and her boss wants her to manage a new branch that is opening in a new location.
Despite this accomplishment, Tina’s heart still yearns for her mother, and for her family but feels she is not prepared to face them yet. She knows it will come, one day, when everyone is ready and the timing is right. Although she has done very well and rarely needs our help, Tina still comes to us for counselling. She needs a confidante, a listening ear in the absence of her family. Our social workers see that there is so much confidence and happiness in her life now. Her baby, whom she adores, is growing healthy and her source of joy.
Tina chose to have her baby and it changed her life completely in ways she never imagined. Whatever choice a woman makes, MHO will walk with her throughout the journey, with love, compassion, and hope for a better tomorrow.
- Aug 15, 2019
Doctors recommend breast milk but, in reality, not all mothers are physically able to and choose baby formula instead to feed their babies. There are many factors that make it difficult for mothers, like Lika, to breastfeed. Lika came to Mother's Heart Organization late in her pregnancy. She was an orphan and was raised by her kind neighbors. She was from a rougher part of town and the family she lived with was very poor. From a young age, Lika didn't always have enough. Now I her early 20s, it was easy to see that she had been malnourished for most of her life. After only a couple of weeks after being referred to MHO, Lika gave birth a month prematurely. The baby was tiny and needed to put on weight right away. MHO staff assessed Lika's situation. She was malnourished and auite sick when she gave birth. All these has weakened her body and affected her ability to produce sufficient breast milk. We knew that she would immediately need nourishing and extra care to rebuild her nutrients supply and be able to breastfeed, and began helping her. First, by providing her food rich in nutrients and minerals and, second, coaching her on breastfeeding techniques. Despite Lika's efforts, she could not produce enough milk for her baby girl's needs. It was then we knew that the baby needed formula to supplement her feeding. Her malnutrition has affected her health adversely that remaining on baby formula was her best option.
Lika is not the only one who has struggles with breastfeeding. MHO helps mothers, like Lika, so they don't feel bad about their choice. What is important is she's making sure her baby is well-fed.
*** And, please, DON'T FORGET. GlobalGiving's Little by Little campaign is still ongoing. Any small donation you give us this week will be matched at 60%. To know more about MHO's program and how to support life-changing activities for more vulnerable women and their babies, click this link .
- Mar 24, 2019
Common single-parent challenges
As a single parent, you might have sole responsibility for all aspects of day-to-day child care. Being a single mother can result in added pressure, stress and fatigue.
Single-parent families also generally have lower incomes and less access to health care. Juggling work and child care can be financially difficult and socially isolating.
Positive strategies
1. Show your love. Remember to praise your child. Give him or her your unconditional love and support. Set aside time each day to play, read or simply sit with your child.
2. Create a routine.
3. Set limits. Explain house rules and expectations to your child — such as speaking respectfully — and enforce them. Consider re-evaluating certain limits, such as your child's screen time, when he or she shows the ability to accept more responsibility.
4. Don't feel guilty. Don't blame yourself or spoil your child to make up for being a single parent.
5. Take care of yourself. Include physical activity in your daily routine, eat a healthy diet and get plenty of sleep. 6. Arrange time to do activities you enjoy alone or with friends. Give yourself a "timeout" by arranging for child care at least a few hours a week.
7. Lean on others. Call on loved ones, friends and neighbors for help. Faith communities can be helpful resources, too.
8. Stay positive. It's OK to be honest with your child if you're having a difficult time, but remind him or her that things will get better. Give your child an age-appropriate level of responsibility rather than expecting him or her to behave like a "little adult." Keep your sense of humor when dealing with everyday challenges.
